Graduation song

The older I get the more things I realize are true like..
Everyone is insecure
No one is really perfect
Everyone lies
Everyone endures hardships
And everyone is handles things differently.
It’s so evident these stages of life now. Growth and development, breaking away in adolescence, that stage of self discovery where ‘no one understands’ then the maturation where you can really grow to understand and you start living outside of yourself. I am realizing more and more how not-different people really are. “no one understands” may be the falsest statement ever made. In fact, most everyone probably understand. Andy Stanley said the other week, “you know how I can preach a sermon and you can go ‘wow that was so specifically for me’? Because we are all the same. You are not that different from the next person!” wow. How true that is. You know what subject to preach because chances are 85% of the crowd need to hear it/have been there before. When I was bulimic, do you know how “rare” I felt? Like no one would understand. Hah. You know probably every teenage girl had an eating disorder at some point? Some more extreme than others of course, and do you know how many middle school and high school kids were probably “cutters”? Gah, a lot! And most of them felt alone and misunderstood (mostly because they liked that feeling) but were they? No. Now, does that make these things ok? Not at all. Should we still try to stop this behavior? Yes, most definitely. But are they a single person behaving this way totally different from everyone they know? No. I am in no way alone or going through something that no one has gone through before. I’m no different from the next person. We have all endured hardship and the only thing that makes us different is our response.

I’m also so done living inside myself and wasting my time with crappy people. Life is too short to waste it worrying about all of your own problems when someone else has the same ones or worse. Time to open my heart to others and help if I can. And I don’t really have the patience to wait around while people in their 20s and 30s scour around for attention like a high school cheer leader. I can pray for you and I’ll be there if you’re in trouble but I can’t put my energy into a raging black hole. And really, you can tell If they are rooted in something more than themselves and the next best thing. Without a deeper meaning to their life energy exhausted into them goes unfulfilled and un-purposed. & frankly I don’t have the energy to deal with that. I also don’t have the time to be worried about people that offend me or hurt me. I’m moving on! I have things to do and places to be and, frankly, I don’t have time to waste on your sorry ass. I will try my best to “live at peace with everyone as far as it depends on me” but at that certain point if they want to be upset or angry that is totally on them.

You know what else I don’t have time for? Insecurities. Love me or hate me I don’t really care. I don’t have time go worry about if someone thinks my thighs are too big or my makeup done wrong. I don’t have time to concern myself with whether or not someone accepts the fact that I love Jesus or my perspective of sexuality. I don’t have the time to worry about whether or not someone thinks I’ll be successful or that I’m beautiful or screwed up or loud. I don’t have the time to lie to peoples faces when i know that some truth needs to be spoken. I don’t have the time to worry about how I may not measure up to something or someone by the world’s earthly standards. I just don’t! News flash: I’m not perfect! And never will be! & double news flash: I dont give a shit!!!!